It is alleged today that the new head of MI6, Sir John Sawers, forgot to tell his wife that he was getting a new job. In a shock revelation today, it appears that Lady Sawers thought that he was 'probably leaving his job as UN ambassador to set up his own business.'

"Sir J. had for a long time hinted that he wanted an allottment," said Lady Sawers. "And I knew that he had an interest in the green economy. So I thought that it was perfectly ok to go on Twitter and discuss the colour of his 'Speedos'."

"He has been somewhat furtive of late, but then, I simply thought that he wanted to keep the 'new allottment' a secret. In fact I was looking forward to the first crop of vine ripened tomatoes that I assumed he was growing for me as a birthday present."

Sir John denied that Twitter messages such as "Sir J will look great in his Speedos when he is pruning the plums" in any way undermined his position as new head of the 'Agency'.

Question: How many PRs does it take to change a lightbulb?        

Answer: None, a PR would give the lightbulb a makeover

Apparently Rupert Grint has swine flu. And there has been a brisk trade in jokes today about people on broomsticks queueing up for their tamiflu. But really? Can pigs fly? Do they do it on broomsticks? And is it justifiable to concoct a story about swine flu hitting Hogwarts... just so that a bunch of comedians can think of every pun possible (relating to the word Hog)?

This is not so much a case of swine flu, but rather spin flu. (sorry about the weak pun)

ps, does JK Rowling realise that Wikipedia has an 'entry' about 'Harry Potter' and it isn't paying her any royalties?